30 Minutes ago in Texas, George W. Bush was confirmed as...See more

In a surprise announcement at the Dallas Wings’ home opener, former President George W. Bush was named the WNBA’s first-ever Honorary Commissioner. The 43rd president, wearing a custom “Dubya for Three” jersey, joked to reporters, “After the White House, I figured I’d finally take a job where the plays are actually bipartisan.” The league cited Bush’s longtime support for women’s sports and his viral 2023 appearance at a Wings game—where he enthusiastically demonstrated his free-throw form—as inspiration for the role.

The move sparked immediate reactions across the political and sports worlds. Former First Lady Michelle Obama tweeted, “Who’s got next? (Seriously, this is awesome.),” while WNBA star Brittney Griner welcomed Bush with a cheeky “Hope you like dunking on Twitter trolls, sir.” Even critics acknowledged the savvy PR move, with one ESPN analyst noting, “He’ll bring more attention to the league in one week than most politicians do in a lifetime.”

Bush’s duties will include ceremonial tip-offs, advocating for expanded media coverage, and—in a nod to his painting hobby—designing a special “Freedom Ball” for the 2024 All-Star Game. “I promise no hanging chads on the scoreboard,” he quipped during the press conference, before joining Wings players for an impromptu three-point contest (sources confirm he went 1-for-10).

The WNBA hopes Bush’s appointment will amplify its push for gender equity in sports. As the former president left the court, he left fans with a signature Bushism: “Fool me once… shame on you. Fool me twice… well, let’s just say these ladies don’t get fooled at all.” The league’s season tips off next week—with a presidential seal of approval no one saw coming.